Monthly Archives: November 2015

Leaving A Legacy

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Recently my elder sister lost a friend. A very nice lady we all knew and
had come to like. She was a doctor and not just any type of doctor
that is just ambitious and only cares about her career, but one that
gave in her time and energy to saving lives and helping out. She was a
very active member of an NGO that helped the Internally displaced
people(IDPs). She spent her time(remember again she’s a doctor)
with them and Alot of her money was invested for this purpose. Let’s
just say she touched a lot of lives and we can only pray that Allah in
His infinite mercy will accept it from her as sadaqatul jaariya (ongoing
charity after death). Ameen.

Now there is one thing that she didn’t achieve in her lifetime. Yes, I
call it achievement because we live in a society that believes you are
inferior once you don’t achieve that. I am sure by now you all know
what that is. Yes, ALLAH did not destine for her to be married in this
world. Now the question is- are you, the married person better than
her? Or is Allah more pleased with you because of your marriage
status? Or is there a Hadith or ayah from the qur’an that gives you
glad tidings of entering paradise before her? Then why is it that the
first thing that comes out of our mouths when we hear of her death is
– ‘wayyoo gashi batayi aure ba’ (shet! And to think she never got
married). Tell me, what has marriage got to do with her death?
If you should ask why it is of great importance for a person to be
married before he/she dies, you would get the same answer from
almost everybody- So that they would leave offspring that would pray
for them. Or some would say- ‘it’s easier to remember one in your
prayers when you see his child’.Now I ask you again- did you
guarantee that person would give birth just because he/she got
married? Didn’t Allah SWT tell us in the qur’an that He would make
some women barren? So what happens to those women? Then about
these kids. How many of them turn out to be actually good? How
many of them Really pray for their parents in the real sense? What
about those that die before their parents? How many kids did our
beloved Prophet Muhammad SAW have in his lifetime yet at the time
of his death, wasn’t it Only Fatima that remained? And even she, did
she not receive glad tidings from her father thatshe would join him
shortly after his death? Did that mean our prophet was forgotten by
hicompanions since he didn’t leave offspring that would make them
remember him?

The Prophet SAW told us in a very popular Hadith that ‘When a man
dies, his good deeds come to an end except three: ongoing charity
(sadaqatul jaariya), beneficial knowledge and righteous offspring that
will pray for him’ (Muslim). Did we notice how righteous offspring
came as the last of the three? He SAW also said ‘The good deeds that
will reach a believer after his death are: knowledge which he learned
and then spread; a righteous son whom he leaves behind; a copy of
the Qur’an that he leaves as a legacy; a mosque that he built; a house
that he built for wayfarers; a canal that he dug; or charity that he gave
during his lifetime when he was in good health. These deeds will
reach him after his death.” [Ibn Majah]

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Can we see how many good things that we can do that will benefit us
after death? If truly and sincerely it’s the after life we are thinking of.
Now ask yourselves- how many of us have really given our marriages
it’s full rights? Can we beat our chests and say we are sure that we
will be included in the Prophet’s saying ‘Any woman that dies while
her husband is pleased with her will enter Jannah?’ Those children
that you love and think are here to stay forever after your demise, how
many duas or adhkars have you taken your time to teach them?
I hope from my tone I don’t sound like I have anything against
marriage. If anything, I love being married. I understand that by
marrying, one has completed half of his deen. What I am against is
the hypocrisy of our people and the superiority attitude in which the
married people carry themselves. Allah tells us ‘Inna akramakum Indal
laa hi atqaakum'(Verily the noblest of you in the sight of Allah is the
best in conduct). He SWT did not specify whether married or
unmarried. There has never been any verse or Hadith stating the
superiority of one status over another(only of course the fabricated
ones that have been circulated). The legacy you live is what will carry
on long after you die just like our beloved Nabiyy SAW. So let us all
try to make the best of our time and stop lamenting over what we
can’t control. Allah is Al- Adl (the Just) and Al-Alim(the One who
knows). His timing is the best. Do the best you can and don’t wait to
get married before you reach your potential. For the unmarried, now is
the time to acquire a lot of beneficial knowledge and put more in
helping the society. For the married, work on yourselves too. Dress
more decently, spend more time with your family And less time
gossiping with other married people about how marriage is hard
work. Let’s all focus more on ourselves for really, in the end, it’s all
about you and Your Rabb.

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May Allah SWT make us all die when He is most pleased with us and
may we be able to leave all the forms of sadaqatul jaariya that would
benefit us. Ameen Ya Rabb
Please pray for my Sister’s friend. Jazaakumullahu khayran

Umm Turab

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